the importance of setting aside time to talk to your wife is not an option, this is a must!!! talking is when women report to build rapport. this may sound like "small talk" to you. you may or may not be ready for it at all times, particularly after getting home from a hard day at work, but take time to talk to her if at all possible. understand the importance she puts on sharing her report and having you share yours. you don't have to give every detail of the day. try, however, to go over a few highlights, a certain happening, something that will make her feel loved because she will be building rapport with the most important person in her life.
remember, too that wives love to talk to release their emotions. because a woman is an integrated personality, she is like a teakettle- she collects all the things that have happened to her over the day, and there is a build up. she needs to release some of these feelings, and it really can't wait until tomorrow or the next day. men are compartmentalized, you can stuff things away and not have to talk about them; you don't have pressure buliding inside the way your wife does. when you let her share her small talk and give her a chance to "let off steam", she will feel good. she will feel connected to you. women also need to talk to realize their feelings. men usually know what they are feeling, and they will talk about it if if they think it is necessary. women, on the other hand, can be feeling a lot of things but now know exactly what they are. as they begin to talk about what happened through the day, they can work back on the problem that they can't seem to put their finger on. that's why a wife sometimes says, "can we talk?". when asked, "why?" she doesn't really know- she just had a bad day and, just need to talk. as a husband you must realize your wife needs to process her feelings- to realize exactly how she is feeling. as she talks to you it clarifies things to her; then she feels better and she feels understood...
